Friday, October 26, 2012

Blood and the Stuff People Ask

Went to MMC last Monday after vomiting blood and feeling nausea.

The visit turned out to be a series of extraneous lab tests, check-ups, etc. I was diagnosed to have high blood. X-ray showed clear lungs, but doctors are wondering why I vomit blood. Endoscopy is also negative. Results for other lab tests will come out in 2 days.

Hospitals are boring. But the staff are entertaining.

At a cardio's clinic, the secrertary/nurse asked if I was there for a consultation. No! I want a McCheeseBurger and a double espresso! Jeez. 

At the lab for the first series of blood test: Nurse asked if it hurts (while she takes vials of blood samples from my arm). No! It feels so good! Do  that again!!! Drain my blood now!!! 

Went to the hospital pharmacy and presented prescription list of initial medication. The pharmacist asked if I'm going to buy meds. No. I'm going to buy ammo. One more stupid question and am going to start shooting people. 

This morning, I went back to the lab for another round of test. After presenting my papers, the staff was like, so this is your Day 2 for sputum test, ma'am? No. this is my 100th day! See, look at my papers, read what it says there. It's written in bold black ink - DAY 2! 

But karma's a bitch and it does bitch. 

Before proceeding to the Heart Lab, I need to have my HMO papers approved. Turned out HMO office is closed because it's a national holiday today. I blurted out loud: Oh, they're closed! Damn! 

The cleaning person nearby heard me and retorted snottily: Yeah, it's obviously closed. The lights are off. And the doors are locked. 

Doh! Bitch. 

It's a good thing I promise to be nice this week.

Just this week...