Thursday, September 13, 2007

Choosing Students

My boss finally decided to hire a new foreign teacher. Thank goodness. Not complaining here but handling all 150 students in a week, for 6 hours everyday, is probably like having sex with an NFL team on a weekly basis. (I dunno why I made that analogy. I just thought of that.) I am terribly exhausted at the end of each class and often wonder if I'd be able to work again the following day.

And since I can now consider myself a senior teacher, I have the option of choosing which class to handle for the homeroom.

Should I choose the parrot like students?

Me: Class, repeat after me.

Class: Class, repeat after me.

Me: Read from the top.

Class: Read from the top.

Or the smart assess who never fail to give me a migraine.

Me: (Reading from the book) And Herman Cortes, the conquistador, after coming back from Mexico, presented the King of Spain with the cacao seeds from the Mayans and that started the popularity of chocolate in Europe.

Smart Ass 1: Why Cortes give King only chocolate?

Me: Maybe because the King likes chocolates?

Smart Ass 2: Kings don't like chocolates.

Me: How did you know that? Do you know any king who hates chocolate?

Smart Ass 2: No teacher. Do you?

Me: (Silently prayed, God grant me the serenity...)

Smart Ass 3: Why Cortes not give King gold?

Smart Ass 4: Yes, teacher. Why no necklace?

Smart Ass 5: I'm Cortes, I give King gold watch.

Me: (On the verge of hysteria) Perhaps Cortes also brought with him some gold and jewelries. But we are talking about the origin of chocolate here that's why the other gifts are not mentioned.

Smart Ass 6: Maybe Cortes is poor.

Me: Whatever! Can you guys just please google the answers to your other questions? That's your homework! (Continued her prayers)

I forgot, the smart-asses' parents personally requested ME to handle the Elite Class, as they don't trust the new teacher (whom they haven't even met yet).

Guess I have not much choice huh?

Sonnet to Fathers