Saturday, April 09, 2005

The Bad Teacher

Today is my last day in the Hagwon. The Wonjangnim told me last Monday that they need someone to work fulltime, which I can not, for obvious reasons. It was fine with me. I know that the Great Provider will give me another job next week. That I never doubt.

School dragged like a boring movie. I wanted to pull the string of time to wind it at 5:40 pm so that I can just go to the movies and watch "Blackout".

I went to the Hagwon an hour and a half before classes start. I played with the kids for the last time.

Soon, I got tired playing with the kids. I decided to teach them the running man and Roger Rabbit. The kids followed suit and we just danced our spirits away.

Before we knew it, standing there by the door, in all his splendor, was the Wonjang. He asked me to fix the tables and get ready for my class. I knew it. Now he doesn't regret firing me. Am so worth it. HAHAHHAHAH! I just don't give a fucking care!


I said goodbye to my first class, composed of snotty 10 year olds. One almost cried. I gave them my celphone number so that they can buzz me whenever they feel like talking to me. That comforted them a bit.

One of the girls, Emily, gave me a friendship ring. So sweet of her. She told me that she will miss me because am the only teacher who played hula with them. Haha! Talk about second childhood. If only Emily knew.

My second and third classes went fairly well. No emotional goodbyes. Nothing. They are bunch of retards anyway.

The last class was something else. My energy, having been consumed earlier with all those games and dancing, has dwindled around 5:00 pm. I was not in the mood to teach anymore. I was not even in the mood to tell these kids that it's our last day together. Heck, I don't care anymore if they get the shock of their lives when they meet the new teacher next week.

I decided to teach them how to curse in English. Oh no, I did not mean to. I swear, I did not start it.

Paul, the perennial late comer, started it all. He asked me what "damn you" means. I explained. Soon, he was asking me what "motherfucker", "shithead", "fuck you" and a lot other curses I never heard of before. I was shocked! I don't really curse, you know. Except only when I am upset.

I asked him where he learned all these words. Apparently, he's been watching too much WWF, that wrestling show. Gosh! It has to stop! Now am worried for my son. He likes watching it too.

I told Paul that these are really mean words and that he should never never say any of it. He just ignored me. He wrote down all the words and started to recite them aloud. I wanted to kick him in the shin but thought better about it. I should have not entertained his questions at all.

I gave them something to do. That made Paul busy for quite some time. Then Noel, the silent one, innocently told me that their American neighbor, whenever he gets drunk, would yell: "Fuck you Koreans!" I wanted to roll on the floor laughing. I tried to keep a straight face though (which was so damn hard to do). Noel seemed so ignorant about the whole thing. Paul started to explain something to him in Korean. I told Paul to shut up! Really! This kid is a different case of ADHD. I am just so glad to be out of this school.

I changed the topic, but Noel prodded me to teach him what to say back to this neighbor. All right, I gave in. I told him that the next time he hears their American neighbor curse them, he should yell back: "Fuck loser! Get outta here!" Noel dutifully wrote it down. I don't hate Americans, okay?

Do I hear Pink Floyd's The Wall in the background?

"We don’t need no education.
We don’t need no thought control.
No dark sarcasm in the classroom.
Teacher, leave those kids alone.
Hey, teacher, leave those kids alone!
All in all it’s just another brick in the wall..."


I'm a baaaaaaaaaaaad baaaaaaaaaad teacher....

Saturday, February 05, 2005

A Little Something About Me

Born some summer years ago, The Wandering Deity is your classic example of a lady with multiple moods, mostly wandering moods, hence, the moniker.

After obtaining her bachelor’s degree in Secondary Education (with major in English), the Wandering Deity opted to join the dog eat dog race of the corporate world. For almost 12 years, she held various positions in the Human Resources, Publications, Training, Legal, and Administrative Management divisions of several multinational firms in Makati City, Philippines.

An adventurous kindred that she is, the monotonous life of corporate realm made her realize that she is missing some big challenges in life- a break actually. Thus, upon getting an invitation from a dear friend to teach in Korea, the Deity packed her bag, abandoned her desire to continue the climb to the corporate ladder and conquered Korea with gusto.

And boy oh boy, was it fun! The challenge of the academic life, the one thing that she has forsaken all these years hit her with such impact that on her first few months here in Korea, she could barely breathe to cope with the thrill of actually practicing what she had learned back in college.

But then again, despite the academic marathon, the nagging pursuit for something else persisted- the passion for beautiful things and everything nice. It's a great thing that Korea has such an abundant supply of boutiques and malls and markets where you can grab fabulous shrilly stuff in such discounted prices (only if you know how to haggle well).

The Deity, being a fashion enthusiast herself since time immemorial finds the Korea shopping experience essentially exhilarating, as such she was enticed to share such empiricism to fulfill another passion-writing.

As such, the Deity, from this day onward, will write just about anything under the sun that amuses her, not just about the latest vogue though, mind you.

As her quest for the authentic meaning of life and genuine leather earring is yet to be satiated, she will take time browsing all shopping corners around metro Korea and at the same time share pieces of rambling about anything: fashion to boys/girls; skincare to heartaches; beauty tips to dating; and just about the classic human confusions.

Sonnet to Fathers